Tiny Tyrant had a doctor’s appointment this morning to check on his thrush (not completely gone – new meds – ick). That was bad enough – I would have to leave the house and make small talk with the nurses and talk to the doctor and possibly parents in the waiting room. Two weeks ago that would have been fine. Now that anxiety is more in charge of my life than I am…
But that ended up not being the most stressful part of my day.
I manage a vacation rental that is a couple miles away from my house. It is a beautiful 1750 sq ft home. Brand new and luxuriously furnished. It isn’t a cheap rental and we tend to have higher maintenance clients than some other places. It’s fun for me and something I can do from home pretty easily since most of the job is online or on the phone.
Yesterday we had renters check out. A new group was due in today. I was in the drive thru line at Wendy’s when I realized that I hadn’t confirmed with our cleaning lady that she had taken care of the house. I got home and wolfed down my food as I tried to call her and text her – no luck.
I called and emailed the renters to let them know that the house might not be ready until 5pm. Then I loaded Tiny Tyrant back into the car and we headed over. The house was pretty clean so I was able to just spot clean and I split the towels and linens between the washer and dryer at the rental and the one at my house, running back and forth and carting a sleeping tyrant up and down the steps and back and forth from the car. Yes, that’s a great idea one month after a c-section.
I was shaking the whole time. I could feel the anxiety clawing at the back of my throat and crawling like ants across my shoulder blades. Dork Dad was going to be pissed that I was overdoing. The renters were going to be pissed at the inconvenience. Tiny Tyrant was late being fed and I was starting to leak out of my shirt. My incision was throbbing and I just wanted to run screaming from my life.
By the time I got the slightly bitchy email from the renter I was ahead of schedule and was able to tell them that I would be finished only 15 minutes past the usual check in time (and well before they would actually arrive in town). I packed up the Tyrant for the last time and headed home.
As of now TT is still in his carrier, asleep. The Wendy’s has been given as an offering to the porcelain god. I spent about half an hour shivering and shaking on the bathroom floor before cleaning myself up and coming to talk to all of you. I can’t decide if I’m proud of myself for getting through it or angry at myself for going through it. Right now I want a chocolate milkshake, better pain killers, my fluffy blanket, the couch and a nice long nap.
In reality I need to sterilize the bottles and pump parts before the Tyrant awakes.